I never knew anyone as grateful for life as she was. She once told me that she knew I would cry for her when she died, but that she would be living in glory, happy as can be in a better place. Yet she was human. A doctor once talked down to her and she was understandably very angry. She was very religious and said that people with their egos made her sick. In mid-session she started to laugh and said, "Look at me! I'm not much better than he is or I wouldn't be so upset!" We talked about how it is easier to not involve the ego so much when not challenged by someone who is really stuck there and how quickly we can fall. She often said she loved me, and told me I was not a pompous ass. I would tell her sometimes in my field you end up being therapist to someone superior to you and you keep learning from them. She smiled.
She told me how she was about to use the prosthesis and now had no legs. The amputations were high and she literally had half a body. We talked about her spirituality and living from the mind, but it was awful for her. I would sit with her in her agony; grief is not a strong enough word. And then she would light up and say she was with her Creator and that she was happy. She said it doesn't matter how long one lives really, that you just transition, and that she doubted it was a big transition.
She said she knew I loved her, and of course she was right. She made a time to cry and a time to be angry, and then she and her Creator were together. She would talk about her wisdom, her children, her ideas about why she went through the things she did, and how she would become aware of how brief all of those experiences really were. She told me to stop feeling so bad for her, that suffering didn't matter because she knew who she was and that all of life was a spiritual experience. Once, asked if she was depressed, she shouted, "Never!" She said her grief was like waves and that she always liked the water.
She was exceptional. She made me search inside myself for that certain something that would enable me to endure what she had with such grace and even times of joy. I am still searching. She is a highly evolved soul and I honor her now. She was in my life as my patient, but was really a great gift. I honor her and wish her a million blessings.